Who invited this bitch anyway?!

This is an open letter to Aunt Flow:

Dear AF,

I don't know how to put this gently, so I'm just going to come right out and say it.  You are unwelcome here.  In fact, I can't stand the sight of you.  I greatly appreciate that you've been so reliable and consistent, only showing up early or late on a few occasions, but I don't want to see you again for a very, very long time.  The truth is I wasn't happy the first time you came around when I was in 5th grade and had no idea what to do with you.  I spent several years hating you and all the baggage you brought, the cramps, the irritability, the bloating.  In fact, I can't think of a single person who enjoys your company.  You have been known to ruin vacations, dates, clothes, baby hopes and a million other things.  Just who do you think you are?!  I strongly suggest you get packing.  Get out of here and don't look back.  This year is my year and I don't want to see your Aggravating Face again until at least 2012. 

Sincerely, 

One angry (temporary) infertile

I'm still hateful, but I feel a little better.  It was no surprise to start my period, but that doesn't make it feel any less craptastik.

A reminder to myself and anyone else in need.

My list of things to do on cycle day numero uno:

• dress in grandma panties and yoga pants 
• enjoy an unhealthy breakfast (chorizo omelet with papas and cinnimon tea)
• go see a movie with Michael, so I can escape my life for two hours
• (enjoy a nice helping of bin candy at said movie-full of childish candies, like gummy bears)
• I might even have a GIANT vanilla latte sometime today, because I can
• before bed I WILL go running, so I don't hate myself in the morning